Whenever I want to cry and moan in self-pity, I go back to read some of the crap I used to post on my original website on Geocities when I was still in high school. Oddly enough, I still feel the same way about Valentine’s Day (and Sweetest’s [sp?] Day) as I did then, so I’m going to copy and paste what I wrote for Valentine’s Day 2002, when I was a senior in high school.
UPDATE: February 13, 2002
Only one more day (actually, just under 5 hours) left until all the lovers in the world try to make up for lost time of love by showering their lover(s) with meaningless and thoughtless gifts. “Love” is a bouquet of roses, but true love is knowing what to buy your lover no matter what the occasion. Knowing what is in her(his) heart and saying what you truly think about them. I love you, I love you, I love you. Why do I love you? I do. You speak a truth to me that I adore and listen to adoringly. I set my eyes upon you and I fall in love… again and again. But you can’t only feel that feeling on 2/14, because love is forever. True love is forever and not for a cheesy holiday.
At that point, I still had some sort of romantic Ideal in me where love was still possible, real love, that is. And at that time, I felt like I had some sort of entitlement to loving and/or being loved, which I have since learned to not be true at all. However, my problems aside, I still think Valentine’s Day is a complete farce. Love is eternal, not daily. Love is forever and lasting, not momentary and fleeting.
“I believe in love, but it’s our society in which we live that keeps tearing me down.”
I also believe in sex.
But that’s for another day.